Jump to content

Recommended Posts

So you trying to tell me you couldn't cheek clinch and make it to the bathroom or atleast sit on it so it doesn't smell? I bet you lifted the left leg didn't you. Did you do the subtle fan away.

The bathroom is right next to the living room where we were all sitting watching tv. Didn't want to run the risk of sitting on the toilet and have it echo off the bowl, then follow me out just for the added embarrassment. I just kept holding it in. My stomach was pissed. Sounded like two whales in the ocean making mating calls.

My name is AdamThis is my Civic Build.7" Samsung Tab 2Kenwood KDC-X896Clarion EQS746Sundown X-15DC 3.5k @2ohmHatersGonnaHate's 02 Civic UBLELD Bypass for Honda Civic/Accord/FitDon's Jeep Grand Cherokee Rebuild

N8ball2013 - i think you'd stick your dick in a blender if it told you it was 40 wtih two kids your age. lol

srp365 - If posting were picking up bitches, I'd be going home single tonight

looks like tony montana sneezed in your car.

VbjgkeI.jpg

kNsESzw.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 19.6k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

So you trying to tell me you couldn't cheek clinch and make it to the bathroom or atleast sit on it so it doesn't smell? I bet you lifted the left leg didn't you. Did you do the subtle fan away.

The bathroom is right next to the living room where we were all sitting watching tv. Didn't want to run the risk of sitting on the toilet and have it echo off the bowl, then follow me out just for the added embarrassment. I just kept holding it in. My stomach was pissed. Sounded like two whales in the ocean making mating calls.

I know that feeling except eventually I went to the restroom and holding it for so long when I let er rip sounded like someone just dropped a 1 ton concrete block in a room with a loud echo all you heard was BOOM BOOM BOOOOOOOM! Now if I have to rip I just say I need to run to the car and crop dust the fuck out of the place.

2013 Dodge Charger

Build Log


1996 Ford Explorer XLT 5.0
Build Log

2005 Honda Civic LX Coupe

Build Log

SMD SUPER SELLER!!!!
My Selling Feedback

Dresig1_zps7acbddbb.gif

Dresig2_zpscfb11527.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

So you trying to tell me you couldn't cheek clinch and make it to the bathroom or atleast sit on it so it doesn't smell? I bet you lifted the left leg didn't you. Did you do the subtle fan away.

The bathroom is right next to the living room where we were all sitting watching tv. Didn't want to run the risk of sitting on the toilet and have it echo off the bowl, then follow me out just for the added embarrassment. I just kept holding it in. My stomach was pissed. Sounded like two whales in the ocean making mating calls.

LOL this had me laughing for a good 5 minutes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Laugh it up, it's part of my daily struggle lol.

My name is AdamThis is my Civic Build.7" Samsung Tab 2Kenwood KDC-X896Clarion EQS746Sundown X-15DC 3.5k @2ohmHatersGonnaHate's 02 Civic UBLELD Bypass for Honda Civic/Accord/FitDon's Jeep Grand Cherokee Rebuild

N8ball2013 - i think you'd stick your dick in a blender if it told you it was 40 wtih two kids your age. lol

srp365 - If posting were picking up bitches, I'd be going home single tonight

looks like tony montana sneezed in your car.

VbjgkeI.jpg

kNsESzw.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why don't you just try this (Note: an Altoid is required to make this practical and believable); stop right in the middle of a big bite. Make your body jump a little in your seat. Then, open your eyes really wide really quick and jolt your face a little. Then, drop the utensil from your mouth, drop your head onto the table and slide off limp body style. Then once you hit the ground just start shaking like your seizing, chew the food you had just put into your mouth and use it to make gross shit come out of your mouth, and obviously make a bunch of grunting/wheezing/yelling or choking sounds to go along with it, you might do some moaning too, but only if you can make it sound completely non-sexual, otherwise you'll just look like a weirdo then, and the whole point of this is to avoid them think of you like that. During this random health phenomena you pretend to have it's pretty obvious that it's your chance to release all your gas and they'll be so worried about you that they won't notice the smell, or they'll assume it's random biowaste from your condition and know they would look like some real grade-A assholes to mention it after watching you suffer such a horrific attack. As soon as you finish deflating your bowel system clam it down a little and then pretend to struggle for something in your pocket, it's that handy Altoid, now you just pop that in your mouth, remembering to keep the attack going minimally, but make it look like a real struggle just to reach your mouth, then give it about 10-15 seconds and during that time start to interrupt the "attack" for short intervals, like a turret-esque style; just short little bursts of seizing and noises. Then, to seal the deal, go limp body again and de-widen your eyes, look around like you have almost no recollection of the attack, then let out that huge sigh at the end, both to sell your relief of being alive and for the real relief you feel for having successfully farting at dinner with your GF's parents without making it awkward or uncomfortable for anyone.

It's much simpler than anything else I've seen proposed so far, and I stand behind its effectiveness as an experienced and successful user of the method.

You can thank me later when you let us know how it goes. Glad I could help in advance.

Biomedical/Behavioral Science Major, The (Self-Proclaimed) Undisputed-Homemade-Woofer-King

Super-Neodymium-Woofer Build Log: The D4BA-V.2 http://www.stevemeadedesigns.com/board/topic/169236-diy-super-neodymium-woofer-build-log/?p=2475620

Fucking love Alan you goddamned fucking super nerd lol

When Alan uses big words I don't understand

It's warming up enough that the donut-punching cyclist douchenozzles are getting their two wheeled fagmobiles out.

Everytime I see a guy driving a mini cooper I cant help but think he loves cock & (2/29/16)-My wife just bitched at me about throwing out things we don't really use. My response of well we don't really use your vagina so should we throw that out was evidently not the right response. I had to leave the room.

I missed Alan.

RIP 5/29/15 - I love you son.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I only read the first few lines but it sounds like it would be a better situation to just drop your pants and shit on the table.

And the fact more than one person agrees does not make it a circle jerk, it makes it a bukkake scene and you're in the middle ;)

Chick took 3 shots of Jager, and then, pissed in my mouth..

B5 Passat Build Log

postedimagel.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Who's Online   0 Members, 0 Anonymous, 248 Guests (See full list)

    • There are no registered users currently online



×
×
  • Create New...