ZombieswithMustaches

Guess who's going to see Fast Five today?! Yeah it's me. Did you guess correctly? If not, maybe you should go learn to color inside the lines a little better, tard!

Should I be scared that the "Pink Panther" theme song just came on in a Chinese restaurant? Am I gonna get mugged?? I have no ill-fitting jewelry on!

Ain't nobody dope as me, I'm just so fresh, so clean...

Any fool can hop from bed to bed but it takes a skilled lover to keep your spouse interested for a lifetime! - a pastor I once heard.

Okay, I'm at On the Border with Jess and Davin. There are a ton of prom kids here. I cant help but over hear their very loud conversations. I, truly, don't remember being that dumb! Mom, was I really?

SOTD: Living Sacrifice - Bloodwork (cause I'm the mood for metal and brutality!)

We regret to inform you all, in this manner, but we lost the baby. Even though it was such a short time knowing, we were elated at the thought of having another baby. We ask that you pray for peace to come to our little family. Thank you. We love you all!

Got a friend wanting to sell her iphone4. Its in mint condition! She works at AT&T. So she's a phone addict like me! She's selling it to get the new white iPhone. She's looking to get $250. Comment, if ya want it!!

Michael Jackson is only white now because Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the black out of him.

Chuck Norris once lost a poker game to Amelia Earhart and Jimmy Hoffa. When was the last time they were seen? @chuck_facts

Chuck Norris uses all seven letters in Scrabble... Every turn. - @chuck_facts