vent...... if you do not care, do not read.

[Cuseikan]

I feel everyone on the trust thing. But I also strongly believe that the person should be a good fit. This is what I look for in a girl. She doesn't want to change you and you don't want to change her. If you two have good chemistry and don't get bored of each other. If neither one of you has a annoying trait that you can't ever get rid of, (ie; eating with your mouth open, nagging, not being able to talk things out) and she has to know how to be in a relationship, like her attitude with other guys has to change. She doesn't allow them to talk to her in a inappropriate manner, and she doesn't do inappropriate things with them. Appreciation is also a HUGE part of my relationship. If she doesn't appreciate the things I do for her, then it shows that she doesn't really care.

Also op, once you feel like things are starting to go down hill call it what it is. No point in wasting each others time. I've done that too many times, tried to compromise in order to keep a girl. Then I noticed I wasn't happy being someone I'm not. And while I was doing that I could of been looking for that right person that fits me. I say never compromise and never settle for less. Because there is not enough time in the world to be wasting on a failing relationship.

[Blazerbass]

My first gf I thought I was in love with... dated her for almost a year (2007 to late 2008 or so). She had dated 4-5 guys before me. But to sum things up, I later realized that I had been overlooking things that made us very different, that I thought were stupid, and couldn't even stand really.. because I was enjoying the whole having a gf thing. She didn't have her feet on the ground straight, didn't "care" about politics and wanted to be a "rockstar", to name a few. One of those people who is spoiled/sheltered and has never had too many bad things happen in their life. She ended up actually laughing at people who were making fun of my political views because she thought it was funny. So yeah the puppy love thing wore off and I finally began getting agitated at these things... it finally began to be like the bare bone relationship thing, it sucked, and I broke up with her, then panicked like a pussy a day later??? lol, I feel like such an idiot now and ran back, then we dated for another week or so and she was just like, yeah its not gonna work. But she never REALLY had a problem with me that I know of.

So anyway...point being...the same thing might be happening you that happened with me. Your gf might be over looking stuff that she doesn't like so much about you because shes caught up in her first bf, but you might be happy with her. Time will tell. You(we) are not to young to find the the girl we want to marry, but it might be to early in your relationship to judge if she really is the one.

Note: I know im not experienced but hey .02

GL man

almost exactly like mine. but me and my gf dated for 2 years and we both have been with at least 4-5 other people so we both know what its kinda like, yet for some reason it got old or something. and the last month things went wrong and i dumped her. and just like you said i panicked like a pussy the day after too haha. weve stayed friends but its not really the same

[white4d96]

I'm only on close to three months with my girl, but we have been close for a while. We share a lot of hobbies and what we don't have in common we are still interested in, i.e. she taught me how to play the cello and after she gets out of school she wants me to help her build a small SQ system in her car. I am still amazed every day; for over a year I wanted to ask her out but was afraid she didn't like me. Then I finally grew the balls to ask her this Memorial day and she said yes; I thought I was dreaming. Congrats and best of luck to the OP, and even if it doesn't work out down the road, never regret something that once made you smile.

[Tek]

I'm 17, been with my girl for almost 2 years. I met her because my friend went out with her, and was friends with her for like, 3 years before we started going out. So Ive known her for 5 years, been going out with her for 2. We were best friends before we started going out. Everything is usually good with us too. She may nag alot but I was raised by Greek women, I can handle any nagging you throw my way.

[tejcurrent]

I agree wholeheartedly with trust. You can be happy with someone you trust but don't love, but you can never be happy with someone you love and don't trust. It makes you paranoid and unpleasant.

I would never get married without dating at least 2 years, although things REALLY change after that

I met my wife when I was 16, dated her when I was 17, and we've been together for almost 6 years. Been married over 2 years now. We were always very similar though, never got in an argument until we were married and that's still only been a heated debate lol. I found my woman who was hot, got straight As and cooked and cleaned, has a great family, and is faithful. I lucked out early.

Before her I dated a girl for almost 3 years, and I thought I loved her to death. My dad told me she was a bitch and that since I didn't get along with her family I'd have problems. Low and behold she cheated on me, her mom always talked down about me, and after I broke it off with her I realized it was just the non-stop sex that kept me there. With this girl I was always worried and other guys were slapping her ass and things like that. With my wife she made sure people understood she was taken.

There's no age limit on love, but it has been proven that the brain continues to develop even into your 20s. I know I've changed a lot over the last few years. Just relax, if you're happy and no one is getting in your way just brush it off- just wait a bit to think about things like marriage, I gave it 3-4 years and I'm VERY happy I took the time. By taking our time and living separate we were able to save up for a house, a nice wedding ring, and a huge wedding like she wanted, as well as paying for her go to college. I have a lot of friends who graduated with me that have been married, divorced, and remarried already.

[Tyan]

to the TRUST i would add HONESTY .... the "last" girl that i liked and was getin kinda serious <<< wasnt HONEST to me >>> so one night when WE were going home from work (yes we work together) i walked her to her car where we had a good night makin out >>>>>>and than (to my suprise) out of nowhere comes her "boyfriend" <<< than this shit got complicated

[Chode69]

FHITA!!!!

j/p i feel you bro...i was in love at 17...we lasted a little over a year and the dumb cunt cheated on me. oh well...ya live and ya learn

[Tyan]

FHITA!!!!

j/p i feel you bro...i was in love at 17...we lasted a little over a year and the dumb cunt cheated on me. oh well...ya live and ya learn

at least u didnt get ambushed like me http://www.stevemeadedesigns.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/01nocomment8so.gif

[BassAddict32]

you know, all you guys here on SMD seem to be more sensible then others. maybe it has something to do with bass........idk. but i'm glad you guys have voiced your opinions and have wished luck. most others don't. as for your stories, i love reading them. well, the good ones. for all the other guys that were cheated on, that sucks. it really does. and i'm sorry about that. my mom cheated on my dad. the only thing i gained from having him as a father (he left when i was 11) was learning what NOT to do. and she puts people in their place if they hit her ass or get to close to her. we haven't had a REAL fight, just a couple small words exchanged. even then, i was the one who got hot headed and said something.

as for later, idk what will happen. alot of people where i live doubt it was going to last 3 months, and it's been 6, going on 7. but she is 1 year older then me, so she'll get out of school before i do. she wants to go to college, so if we even think about anything, it'll be after that. but for now, i'm taking things day by day, and loving every moment of it.

ohhh btw, she read this thread, and told me if i found her some good bassy music, she'd listen to it. lol. once again, thanks guys for reading all of this and stating your opinions and stories.

one last thing, i already told her that if i found out she was with another guy, as stated above.......

[tejcurrent]

"my mom cheated on my dad. the only thing i gained from having him as a father (he left when i was 11) was learning what NOT to do."

See now why does your dad get the bad rap? If my wife cheated on me I'd leave too. I don't want to get into your situation, maybe he is a pos, it just really bothers me that women bad-talk a man to his children after the breakup.

My father was a great man, but he cheated on his first wife. When he left her she told his kids how he was scum, even though he gave them a lot more than he gave me monetarily, and tried to spend time with them. When he would try to visit he was asked to leave before even seeing his kids. There's two sides to every story, and one of my sisters didn't even come to his funeral.

btw- if she's with another guy there's no point in fighting imo. If she's hot enough for you to want why wouldn't someone else want her, and if she's devious enough to cheat she's not worth the effort. I would tell the other guy sorry for stretching it out and watch out for herpes and move on.