funny sayings/old sayings

[thegr8cody]

i work with this older guy and he says some of the funniest things i've ever heard so lets hear what you got!

sloppier than a soup sandwich.

she'd bitch if she was hung with a new rope

couldnt find a dogs ass with a stick

hes as useless as a backpocket on a shirt

colder than a witchs tit in a brass bra in the middle of december

[superdave07]

higher than an bird's pussy

[chud]

higher than an bird's pussy

lower than snake shit

[superdave07]

"That girl is so ugly, she fakes orgasms when she masturbates"

[Neo_frog]

This is just like that time I lived with Superman.

-Peter Griffin

[superdave07]

This is just like that time I lived with Superman.

-Peter Griffin

im so happy you said that. And i'll add.... GIGGITY

[Robert8252]

I shaved my balls for this?

[TeamHT]

This is just like that time I lived with Superman.

-Peter Griffin

Superman: We must stop Lex Luthor before he irradiates the world's supply of gold.

Peter: Uh hi, uh sorry, I know you got a meeting going on, but um, so we are officially running low on Mr. Pibb and Cheez-its, so um, just putting it out there if you're heading to the store later, uh, you know, uh, 800 mile drive for me, like 5 seconds for you. Whatever, I'm not here.

seriously, i can almost quote the entire family guy show almost verbatum

wondertwin "...form of--Hawk! Come on, Peter!"

peter "Okay, I'm coming. Form of--Jayna's tampon. And now we play the waiting game."

[Neo_frog]

Superman: We must stop Lex Luthor before he irradiates the world's supply of gold.

Peter: Uh hi, uh sorry, I know you got a meeting going on, but um, so we are officially running low on Mr. Pibb and Cheez-its, so um, just putting it out there if you're heading to the store later, uh, you know, uh, 800 mile drive for me, like 5 seconds for you. Whatever, I'm not here.

seriously, i can almost quote the entire family guy show almost verbatum

wondertwin "...form of--Hawk! Come on, Peter!"

peter "Okay, I'm coming. Form of--Jayna's tampon. And now we play the waiting game."

Oh that's hilarious.

House.

[DirtyD78]

busier than a whore with three pussies

nervious as a long tailed cat in a room full of rockers

so poor we'll have to jack off the cat to feed the dog