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when i was little i went up to my dad sitting in a chair and said, "filtered or unfiltered" he's like, "what do you mean?" "filtered or unfiltered just choose." he said "unfiltered" i pulled my pants down and farted in his face and ran away lol, my mom came running downstairs, "your dad's up there gagging about to puke you little shit!" lol, ahh the good old days..

I would not be alive to day if I did some shit like that....funny as hell though!!
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I was at the bar with my uncle tonight after I ate all you can eat pizza. He was trying to get me to go bar hopping and i didnt want to go. He said I didnt have a hair on my nuts. I told him he didnt have hair on his nuts and thats a fact cus his girl told us he shaves them like a sissy. He asked howed id like to loose my nuts. I told him he couldnt get no were near my nuts. So he pulled his knife and bent down for my nuts. So i grabed his head put it in my ass crack and let loose the meanest whiskey pizza fart on the face of this earth. his nose was strait barryed in my dickies hahahaha I let him loose and asked him if he still wanted to go for my nuts. We could tell he wasnt talking cuss it was all he could do to hold his beer down lmao man i said nuts a lot in this post

nuts

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I was at the bar with my uncle tonight after I ate all you can eat pizza. He was trying to get me to go bar hopping and i didnt want to go. He said I didnt have a hair on my nuts. I told him he didnt have hair on his nuts and thats a fact cus his girl told us he shaves them like a sissy. He asked howed id like to loose my nuts. I told him he couldnt get no were near my nuts. So he pulled his knife and bent down for my nuts. So i grabed his head put it in my ass crack and let loose the meanest whiskey pizza fart on the face of this earth. his nose was strait barryed in my dickies hahahaha I let him loose and asked him if he still wanted to go for my nuts. We could tell he wasnt talking cuss it was all he could do to hold his beer down lmao man i said nuts a lot in this post

nuts

Thats how ya do it!!Force feed that shit!
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The nastiest is when you have food poisoning. Not only are you able to squirt shit 25mph out of your ass, through the eye of a needle but your leaning over in the bath tub puking at the same time! :o

Had it when I was younger. Did the shit/puke combo at least 5 times a day.

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  • 1 month later...

chinese food ftmfl http://www.stevemeadedesigns.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/mad.gif , i made my truck smell like burnt mustard for a week cause of that shit, and pizza does me the same way, lol for april fools next yr someone needs to break a stink bomb i someones speakerbox and when they start to play it the hole car starts to fukin stink

LMFAO.

i think at one point or another everyone has eaten while on the toilet

Fuck no.

when i was little i went up to my dad sitting in a chair and said, "filtered or unfiltered" he's like, "what do you mean?" "filtered or unfiltered just choose." he said "unfiltered" i pulled my pants down and farted in his face and ran away lol, my mom came running downstairs, "your dad's up there gagging about to puke you little shit!" lol, ahh the good old days..

ROFL.

2015 Honda Civic LX 4dr | 24k miles

Stock H/U and mids/highs

Power Acoustik GW3-12" D2 Sub

HiFonics BXX1200.1D @ 1ohm

Random 2.5^3' dual ported box

NVX LOC

Stinger wiring throughout 

 

1977 Chevy SWB

Cammed 350

Dual exhaust

Cheap Wish stereo

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I tried not to post... but I couldn't stop myself. This thread is too damn funny.

http://www.heptune.com/farts.html

"Facts on Farts" - This is all you could ever need or dare I say want to know about the fart.

12 - 12"s in the STAY PUFT 1989 Chevy Astro

Build & Comment Log

Un-Interrupted Build Log
YouTube Channel

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You have a beard of a mysterious sea captain. I would follow you to hell and back.

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i was in the car with my mom one day and we were driving home and i let out a silent killer :ph34r: for a good 2 seconds ... now the windows were down at the time.. and a few seconds later... my mom smells it and puts the windows up and says "whew a sewer line must have broke" grossest smell i have ever produced.

you ain't been bizzy til you've been wit jizzy.

Vehicle:: 2005 Saturn Ion

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Speakers:: RE SE Coaxials

Subwoofer(s):: (2) 15" RE SEs

Amplifier(s):: Audiopipe AP1500.1D

Audiopipe AP1504

Enclosure:: Sealed

Wire: KNU KONCEPTZ 1/0

Battery:: Kinetik HC600

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A gentleman is mostly likely to fart first thing in the morning, while in the bathroom. This is known as "morning thunder," and if the gentleman gets good resonance, it can be heard throughout the household.

LMFAO!

Is it possible to get stoned after inhaling two or three farts in a row?

(Question submitted by MtBfTr)

I am not aware of any intoxicating agents in flatus. However, most farts contain very little oxygen, and you may experience dizziness if you are inhaling overly concentrated fart essence, simply from lack of oxygen. On the other hand, if you are inhaling farts in the open air and are breathing rapidly in order to inhale as much fart as possible, you may be hyperventilating, which also induces dizziness.

Then there is the intrinsic hilarity factor: farts are so funny in both sound and odor that you might feel high just from the basic entertainment value of farts.

2015 Honda Civic LX 4dr | 24k miles

Stock H/U and mids/highs

Power Acoustik GW3-12" D2 Sub

HiFonics BXX1200.1D @ 1ohm

Random 2.5^3' dual ported box

NVX LOC

Stinger wiring throughout 

 

1977 Chevy SWB

Cammed 350

Dual exhaust

Cheap Wish stereo

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