Awhitewookie

"Alex is going to lunch. He is going to take what I call a Hatch-break. Either come back in 30min, 45min, or 'please come back to work' "

"All she ever wanted was sex. I like, wanted to have a conversation and get our nails done."Mike Sanchez, oh my god why, Mike?

"Are you drunk?" "I dont know. I was at the pool, then everything got all liquidy and I woke up in the shower"I love my drunk self

"as soon as you're born you start dyingso you might as well have a good time"Garrett Michael Laird your song just made glad I'm awake right now

"Hey its Valentine's day! Let's go to Jiffy Lube 30 min before they open!"people I swear

"I usually take it to Walmart because its cheaper" Yea well I pulled your oil filter off and its our signed Jiffy Lube filter from 3-14-12...

"Just because im 54 doesn't mean I've lost it, guys. I'd be all over him like a wet diaper "What.The.Fuck. Professor?!

"No-one cares if you are offended, so stop it"Beautiful

"Theres a whole table of 2's over there boys... whose going in first?"Classic Casey

"We look like were up early for work and getting breakfast... lol no we didnt go to sleep yet. Except maybe in the shower""Shit man im getting a fat burger and 6 in the morning at whataburger"

2 minutes after opening and its already an hour wait for inspection. One of those days

20oz steak, potatoes, and beans all for under $10. Today was a good day

32" cadence18" FI sp415" Massive Audio dmx12" Boston Acoustics8" Sundown sa

After forever of trying to access my Myspace account I finally got in and retrieved some photos. Crazy how much we change! #TBT

Alright here we go: Mcgangbang with a buffalo ranch hot n spicy instead

Always have perfect posture when walking after leg day. Back and ass are so tight lol

Any time I see missionaries I try to say hi to them. Well, I was driving and saw a pair riding bikes. One of them had his head down texting. They are getting bolder.

Anyone near Huntsville have a snake I can barrow?

Appreciate all the birthday wishes and peoole that made it a great time!

As I was paying rent, the guy working said "Thats a sick watch, man"Thanks Matt Hagood, I appreciate it. Thought you'd like to hear also Eric Murphy

Beer for breakfast woop woopIt tastes much better when its earned

Cashier: this is the most alcohol I've sold before noon.Its bid day ma'am. Also, your orange juice is sold out

Caught 2 turtles in the water drunk off my ass today. Great success

Couple hours of sand volleyball with my brothers and friends. Its was a good night

Couple mile run and disc golf with my girl. Going to be a great day